Thursday 12 December 2013

On the desecration of the word ‘Gay’ and the creative need for new insults.



This morning, I noticed on Facebook that a friend of mine had liked a status which made my blood boil. It concerned the current status of the word ‘gay’. As I only just decided to write about this I have to recall the status and its reception from memory:

‘I’m pretty tired of people saying it’s wrong to use the phrase “That’s so gay”. The meaning of words evolve over time and this phrase is following the trend. Using such a phrase is evolution, not homophobia’

The first thing wrong with that statement, is that gay was a word created as an acronym for ‘Good As You’ by the earliest waves of the gay rights movement in the 1960s. Secondly, from my own putrid experiences of people using the aforementioned term; it is mostly straight people who use such a slur when describing something bad. The majority of humanity are heterosexual and therefore they have desecrated this phrase to becoming the shadow of its former self.

I’ve touched upon how using this slur is ‘watered down homophobia’ before in my article ‘Why I am a Straight Man for Gay Rights’ which I wrote for Gay Star News. I won’t go into too much detail here on why I think it’s homophobic to use this slur because it’s quite clearly put in the article.

And it is for that sole purpose that I will post this beautiful photo of James Franco, which helped me gain so many hits on GSN. (And because he’s been my most recent obsession with my discovery of the outstanding Freaks and Geeks).



Returning to the reception of this status – another comment concerned how gay is not being recalled in its definition like the terms ‘bitch’ and ‘slut’ are by Third Wave Feminism. I certainly agree that the SlutWalk is making an excellent job on this, but I don’t see anything happening within the gay movement to make a word of pride and self respect into a term for hatred and bigotry. So if you ever see a ‘GayWalk’ marching for you to use this slur, please let me know about it.

But what stood out for me in the reception of this status, is this comment:

‘People obviously can’t think of any new insults to use and therefore must resort to the most commonly offensive words.’

Now this is something I’ve been keen on for many years now. Insults are an excellent way of expressing your anger and help to relieve stress when we need to chill out. But what makes them most surprising and hilarious is not their delivery, but the vocabulary you use when telling someone how disgusted you are.

Using just a few of the phrases deemed ‘most offensive’ by society is just plain lazy. The English language is the most advanced language in the world with thousands of new words coming into use every minute of every day. We have tons upon tons of luscious verbal gems that can be used to express just how truly treacherous life is for us. So next time you’re trolling someone on twitter or thinking of leaving an enemy dumbfounded, consult a dictionary beforehand and amaze them with words they may never had heard in common usage. Be creative for once. People are scared easily by things they don’t understand and that’s the best way to break someone or something if they have made your life utter hell.

With that said, I’ll leave the almighty (and very gay) Stephen Fry to give us a tirade of the finest insults imaginable:




Wednesday 27 November 2013

On Ian Watkins, Jimmy Savile and the hopeful downfall of celebrity culture



It seems another entertainer has been ensnared by the proverbial witch hunt gripping the nation. Ian Watkins of Welsh band, Lostprophets, pleaded guilty to sexually assaulting a baby last night, making him the first musician since Gary Glitter to be charged since the onslaught of ‘Savilegate.’

Hundreds of people across the country are saying their childhood has been wiped clean from them by the press revealing the disgusting underworld of Savile and co. Comedy writer Graham Linehan mentioned how sad things must be for all those children who weren’t abused on Jim’ll Fix It and how they should get their own back on the cigar chomping weirdo.

But I for one, am actually enjoying the goings on of Operation Yewtree and anything linked to the Savile enquiry. The reason for this, is I just don’t believe in role models. That’s what celebrity culture is built on: worship of an idol, and role models have always appeared to be a form of idolisation encouraged to keep young people from breaking the mould of society.



I remember in school being told to be a good role model for younger pupils, something which I despised, not because I hated the little brats, but because I’ve always had a problem with heroes. I never wanted to be a hero, nor have I ever regarded a celebrity or notable individual as a hero/heroine.

What I’m saying here, is don’t have heroes, and 'Savilegate' is exposing the side of the celebrity which you would never even touch upon in your wildest dreams. Like all parts of society, every person has a Blue Velvet lining (note the David Lynch reference there). You never know who is going to stab you in the back and trample your dreams forever – and all the keen Lostprophets fans are the latest to know this. Celebrity culture, in my opinion, has gone too far and has downgraded humanity to a shadow of its former self. Because of people like Savile we gobble up cheap gameshows and reality television without a single thought otherwise. Britain has been regarded by outsiders as a nation that is easily attracted to trash, and I hope that with the seizing of these celebrities we will know to look over our shoulders more when it comes to the new faces of TV and culture.

I never enjoyed the works of Lostprophets, but my brother was a keen fan in his youth. He mentioned to me the other day how ‘uncomfortable’ he feels remembering that he used to have a Lostprophets poster on his wall when he was 13. The best I can wish for now, is nobody will even dare to play their music at any parties or gatherings now that Watkins has admitted to his crimes.

With all that said and done, I’ll leave Power Quest to play us out:


Monday 25 November 2013

This Week In Weird: Microwave Porn



Greetings internet. I know it ‘s been a couple of weeks since my last instalment but I’m still alive and writing for myself and anyone out there who needs a scribbler.

One segment I am keen to continue here is ‘This Week in Weird’. And this week’s instalment is on the funnier side of the surrealism that inhabits the internet. By that I am referring to webseries: Microwave Porn.

The title alone is enough to make you go, ‘What the fuck?’ But trust me, you won’t be left disappointed when you tune into it. Microwave Porn was a webseries posted on YouTube around 2009/2010 by independent production group: Cancelproof. The theme song will summarise the entire series for you so there’s no need for me to ramble on here.

You’ll find all 12 episodes on Cancelproof’s channel. This, I have to say is the only sitcom which has made many great laughs out of the kooky world of urban dating. All that’s left to say, is why the hell did they stop? If only more episodes of this show existed. And it would have done well on some cable channel for independent comedy shows.

With that said, enjoy your Microwave Porn.


Thursday 31 October 2013

Film Review - Thor: The Dark World



Last night, after 36 hours of celebrating my friend’s 23rd birthday, we headed down to the nearest cineworld to see Thor: The Dark World. This is the sequel to the 2011 film which precluded The Avengers and set up the backstory for antagonist: Loki (Tom Hiddleston).

The Dark World picks up directly after The Avengers, with Odin, king of Asgard sentencing Loki to life in the city’s prison, before cutting to the eponymous hero (Chris Hemsworth) who is enforcing brutal law and order across the nine mythological worlds. Loki’s attack on New York led to the outbreak of chaos and it is now up to Thor to restore faith in Odin.

Thor eventually discovers that one of Asgard’s sworn enemies: Malekith the Accursed (Christopher Eccleston), is returning from a 5,000 year sleep to retrieve the ultimate weapon: The Aether, capable of possessing mortal and god-like beings. This leads him to London, where he meets up with love interest Jane Foster (Natalie Portman) and comic relief Darcy Lewis (Kat Dennings), whose expertise he must use to stop Malekith and his Dark Elves from obtaining The Aether.

Through a confusing sequence of discovering a rift between the mortal world and Asgard, Foster is accidentally infected with The Aether and is left in need of protection. Thor steps in and takes her back to Asgard to protect her with Odin’s might. Eventually, the hammer wielding guardian works out he has to tackle Malekith on earth before the nine worlds align and must return by betraying his father and enlisting Loki’s help.

Soon, the heroes end up back in London for the final showdown, leading to a battle of epic proportions and a very witty use of the London Underground.

Above all the epic fantasy battle scenes, this film was much funnier than the last. An excellent cameo from comedy actor Chris O’Dowd (The IT Crowd) and Kat Dennings’ crazy observations made me laugh out loud more times than any other Marvel film. It wasn’t spectacular, but it wasn’t atrocious either. I went into the cinema expecting to see fantasy battles and a growing love story between the protagonists and that is what I got. Christopher Eccleston’s Malekith put up a courageous fight knowing he meant business. Natalie Portman also offered a stellar performance with plenty of intelligence oozing from her character and not falling into the ‘damsel in distress’ trope.

But I must say, I felt sorry most for Chris O’Dowd being cast as the lovable human loser who’s attempts at finding a girlfriend got him caught up in a battle that would have destroyed nine worlds if lost. 

Here’s to one very funny and entertaining Marvel film. Proper ‘park-your-brain-at-the-door’ entertainment.

Rating: 3/5